Vicki Vale: Welcome to Ryder v. Vale. I'm your co-host, Vicki Vale.
Jack Ryder: And I'm the co-host you came here for, Jack Ryder.
Vicki Vale: [pause] Seriously? Y'know... Nevermind. Anyway, [nervous laughter] I think our listeners didn't come to hear us argue today...
Jack Ryder: That's right, Vick. We've got some very special guests here to argue for us today.
Sebastian Hady: Now Jack... may I call you Jack? Okay, great. Jack, I didn't come here to argue. I came to have a real conversation with my rival, District Attorney Grange.
Lincoln March: Rivals. Plural. [chuckle] I'm in this race, too, Mayor Hady.
Sebastian Hady: Whatever you say, but you're only at sixteen percent in the polls, Link... do you mind if I call you Link? Do you really think you have a chance? I think you just enjoy wasting money.
Marian Grange: Let's say we introduce ourselves before we descend into the schoolyard squabbling?
Vicki Vale: [sigh] There's an idea! Splendid. Mayor, would you like to begin?
Sebastian Hady: Thank you, Vicki. Hello, listeners. This is your mayor, Sebastian Hady.
Jack Ryder: And sitting between Vicki and I is...
Marian Grange: District Attorney Marian Grange. I am running for mayor of Gotham City.
Lincoln March: And I am Lincoln March, from March Ventures, which you may have heard as the sponsor for the expansion to the children's wing at Elliot Memorial Hospit-
Sebastian Hady: These are introductions, Link... not a sales pitch.
Vicki Vale: Okay, okay... There will be plenty of time for the freestyle debating. But first, we have some questions from our listeners.
Jack Ryder: That's right. From, uh, [papers rustling], Carrie Kelley asks "If elected, what are your plans for Arkham Asylum?" And I'll ask the candidates to be brief. We have a lot of questions and little-
Sebastian Hady: Allow me to field this one. Arkham is a proud institution of Gotham... and landmark even, and now with ARGUS investment in the facility, it is more crucial to Gotham than ever before.
Lincoln March: What Mayor Hady isn't saying is that he plans to expand the old asylum to become a world-class prison. Sure, it'll bring in billions in ARGUS funding, but it will also put thousands of Gothamites out of their homes. In fact, the Narrows is where Gotham's population density is at the highest. Does that sound like a mayor who cares about the people of his city? Arkham needs to go.
Marian Grange: I agree that Arkham needs to go... but not the facility. The man. Under the reign of Jeremiah Arkham, our asylum's our recidivism rates are escalating. We need a new director to take the reigns of Arkham, focus on treating the criminals instead of just warehousing them! We need a director at Arkham who cares more about the patients than his family's legacy.
Sebastian Hady: Says the candidate who is being backed by Bruce Wayne? The guy who's name is on every other street corner... and who's name would be on Arkham if Grange has her way. Wayne Mental Hospital? Please, Marian.
Marian Grange: Bruce Wayne is Gotham City's most charitable philanthropist. Also, Thomas and Martha Wayne, whose names would be on the asylum, were killed by the same sort of criminals that need this vital treatment?
Lincoln March: I'm sorry, Marian... but Wayne was the most charitable man in Gotham... but if you actually do the research you'll see March Charities has donated more than the Wayne Foundation to mental health programs-
Vicki Vale: I'm going to stop you there, Mr. March. We need to go to take a moment to thank today's sponsors... [papers rustling] which is... Are you kidding me? [sigh] Wayne Enterprises...
