ObMod I Now Pronounce You Mr. and Mrs. Batman

ObMod: I Now Pronounce You Mr. and Mrs. Batman



  • Legends Hotel & Casino, Atlantic City, NJ
  • December 31st 2016, 2309 Local Time

VOX Archive

  • Bruce Wayne: [beep, lock disengaged, door opens] Here we are... the Deluxe Presidential Suite. Sorry, I couldn't get the penthouse.
  • Selina Kyle: Oh? Don't you own this casino?
  • Bruce Wayne: Co-own with Oliver... but taking the penthouse on such short notice would have required evicting the Sultan of Umec and I thought it wise not to start a war so early in our marriage. [chuckle] Let's get past the honeymoon phase first, yeah?
  • Selina Kyle: Ah... Even without the cape and cowl and you're preventing the world from sliding into crisis. I'm impressed.
  • Bruce Wayne: Shall we then? [footsteps]
  • Selina Kyle: [giggle, footsteps, grapple, fabric shifting] Hold up there, sailor... Aren't you forgetting something?
  • Bruce Wayne: [sigh] You're right. How could I forget? [chuckle] I need to carry you across the threshold... [clatter]
  • Selina Kyle: [giggle] Think you can manage that? I have put on a few pounds and you've only got the one good arm right now.
  • Bruce Wayne: [chuckle] I think I can handle it... [clatter, grunt, chuckle] Tah-dah.
  • Selina Kyle: [giggle] My, my... Someone's been doing crossfit against doctor's orders, haven't they? [moist lip smack]
  • Bruce Wayne: [chuckle, footsteps, foot kicking door shut, footsteps]
  • Selina Kyle: What about our luggage?
  • Bruce Wayne: [chuckle, footsteps] I'll get it later. For now I have a marriage to consumate.
  • Selina Kyle: [giggle] You're not worried someone's going to steal our luggage?
  • Bruce Wayne: Why worry? I've got the thief cornered right here... [body setting on mattress, shoelaces being worked, shoe dropped on floor]
  • Selina Kyle: [body shifting on mattress, sheets rustling] I was more worried about other thieves, Mr. Wayne.
  • Bruce Wayne: [scoff, shoelaces being worked, shoe dropped on floor] I'll get them in fifteen minutes.
  • Selina Kyle: [scoff] Fifteen minutes? Really?
  • Bruce Wayne: [sigh, chuckle] An hour?
  • Selina Kyle: [giggle] They'll definitely be gone in an hour.
  • Bruce Wayne: [fabric shifting, fabric tossed on floor] It'll be fine. If they get taken, I happen to know a decnt detective. [zipper unzipping]
  • Selina Kyle: [sigh] There's just the roller suitcase and the handbag. I could get them. [body shifting on mattress, sheets rustling]
  • Bruce Wayne: I wouldn't dream of it! [fabric shifting, single foot hopping, fabric shifting groan] [distracted:] You... stay... right... there. [gasp, thud, clatter]
  • Selina Kyle: Wow... That there is a mental image I never thought I'd see. [giggle] I've caught Batman with his pants down... Ooh, nice Superman boxers. [giggle]
  • Bruce Wayne: [groan] This... cast is... [whack, plaster cracking, hand tearing plaster apart] It was due to be off in two days anyway. It's fine.
  • Selina Kyle: [giggle] Okay, but... Now you're going to need to wash that forearm. I can smell it from here. [giggle] Go wash up. I'll get the suitcases.
  • Bruce Wayne: [sigh] Fine. [clatter, hand peeling plaster apart, footsteps, door opens, faucet turned on, running water]
  • Selina Kyle: [footsteps, door opens, clatter, wheels rolling, clatter, footsteps, door closes] There, your roller bag is right inside your room, by the door. [clatter, footsteps] It felt kinda heavy... You sure you didn't pack your arsenal in there?
  • Bruce Wayne: I promised you I wouldn't. [water running, scrubbing]
  • Selina Kyle: [clatter, body sitting on mattress, sheets shifting] Yes. I didn't ask you if you promised. I asked you if you packed your arsenal.
  • Bruce Wayne: I keep my promises. [water running, scrubbing]
  • Selina Kyle: [clatter, shoe dropped on floor] Is that so? [clatter, shoe dropped on floor]
  • Bruce Wayne: Yes, it is... [water running, scrubbing]
  • Selina Kyle: I recall on instance where Batman told me to give back the Kane Diamond. [body sliding off mattress, buttons being undone, fabric shifting] ... and if I did, Batman would let me walk away and not go to Blackgate. [fabric sliding off skin, fabric dropped to floor, footsteps] And what happened when I gave Batman the rather large and impressive diamond that I impressively stole?
  • Bruce Wayne: [sigh] Batman put Catwoman in a joint-lock and took her back to Blackgate.
  • Selina Kyle: No... you put me in a joint-lock and threw me in the trunk of your car. [sigh, clasp undone, fabric shifting] And then you took me to Blackgate! So, what was it you were saying about your promises?
  • Bruce Wayne: That was Batman breaking a promise to Catwoman. [faucet turned off, towel wiping arm, chuckle] We're not talking about that. We're talking about promises Mr. Wayne gives Mrs' Wayne.
  • Selina Kyle: Wait, so... did i marry the wrong guy? [giggle] My goal was to be Mrs. Batman. [giggle] Wait, do I need to call one of my old doctorsar Arkham? [fabric dropped on floor, body sliding onto mattress, sheets rustling] Are you under te impression that Batman and Bruce Wayne are two different people?
  • Bruce Wayne: [footsteps] You know there's a difference.
  • Selina Kyle: Yes. One is the real you and the other wears a mask... Wait... does that mean you're going to take off the billionaire playboy mask and let me [expletive] Batman tonight?
  • Bruce Wayne: Ha... Ha... Ha... [footsteps] The playboy act may be the fiegned persona for most, Selina... But for you, [footsteps] I've always been- Whoa!
  • Selina Kyle: [giggle] Cat got your tongue?
  • Bruce Wayne: You're, uh...
  • Selina Kyle: [giggle] Naked? I know.
  • Bruce Wayne: [chuckle] Actually... I was going to say you are really pregnant.
  • Selina Kyle: [gasp, body shifting on mattress, hand grabbing pillow, pillow toss, soft whack] Yeah? You noticed that did you? Very astute, detective. [giggle] Maybe you'd like to guess who the father is?
  • Bruce Wayne: Ha. Not funny.
  • Selina Kyle: [giggle] It was a little funny... [giggle, scoff] Oh, stop it! You know it's your little bat in this belfry. I'm sure you've run tests, too.
  • Bruce Wayne: What I meant by that is that you're incredibly beatiful... There's a glow about you. You look genuinely happy.
  • Selina Kyle: And yet you're still as dour faced as you always are... [giggle] Get over here and let me see if I can put a smile on your face... after I finish undressing you so you don't fall on the floor again.
  • Bruce Wayne: I didn't fall... I... was repositioning myself to the ground for a better strategic vantage-
  • Selina Kyle: Yeah? And I'm the Queen of Vlatava... [scoff] Just shut up and kiss me already.
  • Bruce Wayne: [footsteps] Of course. [buttons being undone, footsteps, fabric shifting, fabric tossed to floor, footsteps, body climbing onto mattress, mosit lip smack, chuckle] I love you, Mrs. Wayne.
  • Selina Kyle: I love you, too, Batman. [wicked giggle, moist lip smack, moaning, bodies shifting on the mattress, prolonged kissing]

Trivia and Notes

Links and References

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